A Week in the Life of THE Cynical Fat Girl

So, it's been over a week since my last post. Sadly, I've been trying to write and I can't seem to get words to work right on paper... or computer screen as the case may be. It appears that I have lost the "Embracing THE Cynical Fat Girl" thread. I'm sure I'll pick it up again soon, but in the mean time, there's quite a bit going on these days. School - CAPT is over. YAY!!! We just closed 2nd marking period (we run on trimesters) and grades were due Tuesday... Fortunately, the due date was extended to Wednesday and I was able to get everything done!!! Monday night, two weeks ago, my sister, Sarah, started getting some strange prank calls around midnight. The calls continued until 2am. She called a friend who came to her rescue. As soon as the friend got there the calls stopped... Which freaked her out a bit. I stayed at her house Tuesday night for company and to tell the jerk off if he called again. Thanks to our local State Police, patrols have been stepped up in the neighborhood and random weirdness has been kept to a minimum. The problem with Tuesday night was this.... My oldest and dearest friend called just as I came through my apartment door with three loads of laundry ready to finally do some cleaning in my much neglected house. She had been admitted to the hospital having difficulty breathing. As it turns out, they think she aspirated some medication when she choked on it... What kind of adult woman can't get a teeny tiny little pill down the right way? So I rushed out of my house and up to Putnam to be by her side and to make her laugh - at herself of course. Unfortunately, I didn't grab my overnight bag and was supposed to be at Sarah's once I was kicked out of the hospital with the end of visiting hours. I decided my best option would be to go straight to Sarah's, wake up early and run home to take a shower and get dressed before work. An easy solution right??? Wrong!! As I was driving home, heading south on I395 going probably 75-80 mph, my rear driver's side tire experienced a blow out! With some finesse I was able to ease the car off the highway and didn't injure anyone in the process. I got out of the car, looked at the tire and began making a myriad of phone calls. Call 1 - Insurance company - I have emergency road side assistance. Unfortunately, they couldn't quite figure out where I was... Call 2 - School - I had to let my administrator know that I would be a little late.... actually that I'd be at school but I had no idea when.... Call 3 - my co-teacher. I figured she'd be worried when she heard about the situation. She wasn't in yet, I left a message. Call 4 - My parents - I needed help - unfortunately no one answered the phone Call 5 - My mechanic to see how early I could get the tire fixed - he wasn't there yet and doesn't have an answering service At this point a State Trooper arrived. I was only somewhat relieved. His first question - "Are you injured?" I said no. Second question - "Did you hit this sign?" (it was one of those "Emergency and authorized vehicles only" signs that had obviously been knocked over by a snow plow during the snow storm that weekend.) I said no. He asked again "Are you sure you didn't hit the sign?" I said I was sure... But what did I know, he walked around to the front of my car and checked for damage to be sure that I in fact had not hit the sign. I was a little offended. I pointed snottily at my rear tire. He looked at me and said - "I see it." He said he would call a tow truck, I said I'd already called my insurance company. He said it would take too long, in frustration I gave in. At this point he said I could get back in the car to make any calls I needed to make. Call 6 - Sarah. I figured she'd want to know what exactly I was going through for her. Call 7 - incoming My coteacher - who was more disappointed that the state trooper wasn't single... but at least she was empathetic and only looking out for my dating life. Call 8 - incoming My Dad - who yelled at me for not having a spare tire. Call 9 - My mom- I called because my dad had yelled at me and I couldn't afford the tow and the cost of fixing the tire.... She said she'd help At this point, stress and minimal sleep caught up with me and I started to cry. The State Trooper came back to tell me a tow truck was on the way. Completely taken aback by my tears, he jumped, held both his hands out almost in surrender and said "Ma'am it's ok, there's no need to cry!" Embarrassed I brushed my hands across my cheeks and said... "Oh, it's just stress!" Call 10 - incoming My insurance company - they finally figured out where I was and were able to call some obscure towing company that I have NEVER heard of... I told them the State Police were able to get a tow faster and that I would pay the bill then submit it for reimbursement. Once the tow truck arrived, I got out of the car and the Trooper came over to talk to me while they loaded my car onto the truck. He asked where I worked, I told him, he looked at me quizzically and said "You missed your exit." (mind you, I was wearing a sweatshirt and jeans I had slept in, my hair was a frizzy white girl fro in a pony tail on my head.) So I felt I ought to explain to him what had happened... "I slept at my sister's in Thompson last night, she was getting weird phone calls." Well, that was all it took, he had heard about it from the academy and suggested it would be a good idea to make a report.... And then of course he was all friendly and helpful... No more suggestion that I had hit the sign... oh and about that... I drive past this sign everyday and was looking at it the other day.... There is no way I could have hit the sign at that angle without doing serious damage to my car, and then get the car into the position it was in.... I'm still a little offended. I ended up getting to work an hour and 15 minutes late. But at least everything worked out in the end.